drink. drank. drunk... stumble down memory lane.

it's that day again. the day before Thanksgiving. All my American blog-ers & -ettes know what THAT means... time to get drunk & see all the people we went to high school with that are home for the holidays....

eiy...

Like the tradition stands for the past 2 year, JenBunny & I will suit up & stomp out to the local watering holes to squeeze up to the bar, flashy a toothy smile to our b.tender friends & tell them to "keep them coming, no matter what"... Then, drink in hand, we'll turn from the bar & see a sea of people we haven't seen in ages, haven't thought about in ages, or hoped we'd never see again.

i wonder... will the Ex-Duck be there? Wow... now that i think about it, i don't think i ever even talk about him on here. I guess i'll have to give him a cute name... Well, when we were dating, his nickname (from me) was Stinky Face... So i guess, since he's an ex, i'll call him "Stinky Ex-Duck" hahah

So, JenBunny & I will set out with a new mod squad member, GiaPet, newly 21 (awe, she's so cute) & gearing up for her first time out on T.Giving Eve.

what to WEAR?!

  -obviously the most important aspect of the evening. It's f'n cold in the North East, so i can't go scandalicious, plus, i don't want anyone thinking that i went from last years "finished community college & got a job" to "working as a middle class hooker escort". (ew, can u just imagine? the creeper face that sat next to me in Sr. year History corners me & offers me a few bills... UGH i'd vommmm!)
 -i def want to show off that, since last years fat fest, i've dumped the lumps & luv it.
 -Mall w/ GiaPet & Em Butthead Sis Piece should help get some order better than the Chaos that is my room (& the suitcase i'm still kinda living out of - thanks for the loan AmeCakes!)

what to DRINK!?

 -you have to have something to take the edge off, but it's all about pacing yourself after that. one good pregame shot should be perf. but it is a bad idea to wait to get to the bar for that relaxer. inevitably, you'll wait to get up to the bar for so long, that you'll end up already having had 15 awkward small talk convos before the booze even sets in. At that point, you'll be so stressed and annoyed, you'll order 3 shots. That'll make you so silly that the next time you go up, you'll want more &, "a round for the house, while you're at it"... bad news bears for liver & bank account... & for your guilt the next morning while you're snoring off the reunion hangover & mom is running around like a turkey with it's head cut off baking pies. never fun.
 -wine looks classy, but i luv it too much to be fair to myself. i can get real silly after 3 or 4 glasses... but i won't stop.
 -i guess it'll have to be mainly beer. That will protect me from any shot combos, & keep me occupied enough that i won't be sucking down straight gin or vod. eek. i just dread how my tum will fair in the morning. won't be fun!
 -def don't want to get carried out... well... unless...

what to SAY?!?

 -Hey! How ARE you?! Me? I'm good... I still live at home.... Still working for the online company... ya... the one w/ the strippers and clowns... uh huh.... no, i'm not seeing anyone... ya, i'm in school... in california... no, no, I take online classes... what am i going to do with that? umm... i'm not sure... When will i be done? oh... uh, about... 6 years? ya... just in time for my 30th birthday... & just AFTER our 10 year reunion... ya... i'll give you an update next time... maybe i'll invite you to my graduation... ya.... well, cheers... have fun.... thanks for ignoring me in High School.... ::big cheesey smile::

when to LEAVE!?!?!

 -This is always hard... you don't want to get there TOO early, but if you wait too long, you're never getting up to that bar, even if you do make a regular appearance at the bar & happen to text message with BOTH cute bartenders on a daily basis... These things actually make you LESS likely to get a drink, i've found, bc they know you won't get mad at them. They know you'll understand... ugh.
 -Leaving is the biggest problem. inevitbally, you'll be at one bar & the hot guy from Sophomore math will be at the other one. You'll ask someone "who did you see at the other bar" & they'll say his name. So you finish your drink & gather your peeps & rush to the other bar... just to find out "oh, he just went to the OTHER bar" (fuck, good luck, bc you're never gunna get your crowd to venture back up the steep main street hill, probably in the rain, to go back to the same mob so you can see some guy you drooled over when you were supposed to be learning quadratic equations, or... something...)
 -i guess as long as i can make it home walking, or get out of there before i make too much of a fool out of myself...

So, to all of you making this adventure out tonight, good luck. i truely hope that we can all have a blasty & remember the good times, laugh off the bad times & look fuckign hot as hell to make our ex-ducks (or ex-chicks) sweat a little.... BUT DO NOT trust the ex if he says he's single... chances are he is NOT... if he doesn't live in town, he probably thinks he can score some yum while "shes" in her hometown... fuck'n asshole...

Have fun, drink your faces off, have a BoMo (AmeCakes word: Black Out Make Out), brag... but, stay classy "san fransisco".

oh ya... &... try not to vom!

also - i read this HILARIOUS article from The Onion about this very night! i LUVS it... read it. it's a great laugh for anyone! 

luuuuuuuuvs it!

ps: i'd like to send out some *good vibes* to my hunnie-luv NaNa. Her mother isn't feeling well & is having some tests done. Everyone please think positive thoughts for her & her family. we luvs u mama.

trick or treat, bitches!

i hope that everyone had a treat-tastic halloweeeeen!
my night started off a bit rocky, but after 2 hours of painting my face, teasing my hair & frosting myself in bling, i was transformed.

Spanky became Daisy

unfortunately, no one knew who the hell i was...

what do people WATCH if they don't watch VH1 reality tv!?! Who DOESN'T watch Daisy of Love?! ...as i type i'm watching the wonderful television program, Tool Academy 2!

i think i looked awesome, just say'n...

me as Daisy last weekend at Mattman's birthday party... he was Frankenberry!

So, i threw on my Uggs & climbed in my cute new car & drove my ass 50 mins to JenBunny's new appartment. After a few final touch ups, we were off to White Plains, NY to park in a garage, walk to the main road & take our place in the very loooong line of half sober, half wasted clowns, french maids, mario brothers, Giants players & slutty lady bugs...

JenBunny was a hot mama in her "Free Rides" Taxi driver costume, Cheryl rocked it out as a super hot Baseball Player & Michelle went as a sexy kitty with stick on whiskers that kept falling off when she smiled. (I LOLed at her when she, out of no where, exclaimed that she "hates dumb cats"! haha)

JenBunny as Taxi Driver

 

Cheryl as Baseball Player

 

OK, this wasn't the costume that Michelle wore, she had black leggings & a black tube top, but this is just so hot! i want it!

Mario, Luigi, slutty Girl Scouts and a random dude in a black & white camo shirt were behind us. The Girl Scouts were passing out Philanthropy by grinding up against Gorrila's, basketball players and singing "Go Banana, Go Go Banana" (with a clear slip into Holla Back Girl a few times... "b-a-n-a-n-a-s!") to a Giant Banana guy, who, needless to say, luvd the attention.

i couldn't find a "Go Banana" clip... but i did find this funny banana video!

The line started to get old REAL fast, especially when, after an hour & a half, it started drizzling... (fml)...

we watched the Costume Contest throught the window while we waited. We saw the Mystery Inc. gang, complete with Scooby (came in 5th place) - (which made me jeal bc i've ALWAYS wanted to do that), the Jolly Green Giant (came in 3rd), a guy in a Hooters outfit, Plaxico Burress with a GSW to the leg (hahah, didn't place, but i got a good LOL out of it), and a few Lady Gaga's, one of which was male.  -i didn't get to enter... :o(

So, we FINALLY got into the bar & i quickly downed 2 back to back shots of tequlia, straight up, no training wheels for THIS lush, and then got my groove on, brewski in hand.

it was fun for a while, once the 3rd shot of tequlia hit my system, but i was not finding any boys to mac on... :o(
my hopeful goals for the night (find a Brett Michaels for my Daisy, or an Edward Cullen to make out with) weren't going very well.

 

There was a bunch of guys next to us dressed as Street Fighters, characters from a video game that i had no clue about. They enjoyed explaining that it's an awesome game somewhat like Mortal Kombat. They were kool, but i was still without a h.ween squeeze.

"...another Coors Light please"

a few more jams, a few photo opps (on cameras that were not mine, so i don't have them to load yet), an Edward Scissorhands, Chris Angel and a Preist later, i turned around to see a TOTAL QT!

could this be my halloween Duck? hmm...

He was another Street Fighter, but to my happy surprise, looked more like Flex than Bret Michaels. (score!) 

 He was supposed to be Guile, from Street Fighter, which... means... nothing to me... but he was hot. haha

So, we chatted for a bit, he didn't guess who i was supposed to be (pout) but i forgave him. After a while of chill'n (i think dancing?) drinking and having a competition to see who could get the bartenders attention first (i won. duh.) he was gracious enough to accompany me out to the back porch for a ciggarette & some quieter surroundings.

& after a little while... Daisy & her Street Fighting Flex did a little of this...

umm... Quuaaaaaaaaccck!!!

we hung out the rest of the night; MO'n, LOL'n & Luv'n H.ween.

then, my GD iPhone died before i could snag the digits (doh!) but i gave him mine... so, we'll see what happens... hopefully there will be something there!


luvs it*

makeover.

Ya Dig?

Rickdiculous just told me that my new banner was "emo" - to which i had a very clever comeback

"YOUR'E EMO!"

... (hey, i never said i was mature...)

What do you think, readers? You're the ones that will be look at it (i hope). I like it, but if you've got a better idea, hit me with it.

JenBunny changes her blog layout and banner more often than her socks. (which is true because the girl always has flops on).

What do you think of this idea? I wish that i could set it to be on some wicked kool *random* setting to rotate every day, but that would probably be really annoying. (if anyone knows how to do this, please let me know! it would make my life and JenBunny's life a lot easier... choices are hard!)

I'm working on a few more options and then, i'll let you all help me pick. Keep your eyes peeled!!!

luvs it*

Dark Side of the Moon

As i told you all last week, i've been writing the "What's New is New" article for my companies MySpace page.

I'm really enjoying getting a chance to write about current topics & get PAID for it!!!

Here's my post for this week:

Dark Side of the Moon

The month of October is almost and, in true fashion, a lot of strange things are happening in the world, leading up to, what seems to be, a pretty weird Halloween.

In the past week, we saw NASA “bombing” the moon, everyone’s favorite Werewolf, Taylor Lautner look amazing in the pages of GQ magazine, joy rides in silver mylar space ships, and the upcoming release of “This Is It”, the touching story of the last days of the ultimate “Thriller” to be in theatres October 28th.

Halloween is the perfect time to allow yourself to be scared and raise the paranoia of the Boogie Man, monsters under the bed, and things that “go bump in the night”. The movie Paranormal Activity asked fear fans to demand that their local theatre screen the film, and after 1 million demands, it was released nationwide.

Performers: Grab your fake blood, vampire teeth and shreds of the un-dead’s threads, and go wild this year! If you’ve booked a Halloween party, or even if you have an upcoming public event, show your freaky side and make the audience scream! Remember, it’s always fun to get spooked, and being a clients “treat” this Halloween is sure to make them remember you for next year!


What do you think? Should i think about becoming a reporter? JenBunny thinks she can see me as one... i played one in a play in 8th grade... that was fun...

Have fun counting down the days to h.ween 2009!

Check in on all my "What's New" posts at www.MySpace.com/GigMasters

luvs it*

edward*

You know, I’ve never had much patience with Romeo.
Edward Cullen, New Moon, Chapter 1, p.17

Yes, I'm obsessed... dumb AmeCakes & stupid JenBunny got me fucking addicted so bad, i think they're sick of hearing me go on about this damn book...

Sorry R. Pattinson, it's nothing personal, it's just that, i would never have cast you to play Edward. I think you're just too... awkward for my taste



I've seen a LOT of internet discussions about this subject and everyone seems to have an idea of who would be better.

Daronline.wordpress.com thinks that everyone from one of my FAV hotties, Scott Michael Foster (Greek) to Chris Evans (Fantastic Four). I luv them both, but S.M.Foster is def not Edward, he's Cappy (waaaaay too goofy to be Edward) & Chris Evans is too old.... Johnny Storm is also too much of a clown to be Edward.

Scott Michael Foster

Chris Evans

Fans on the Twilight Facebook Dicussion Boards said actors such as Matt Dallas (Kyle XY), to Sean Farris (The Sleepover and that awesome show Reunion that i luvd, but it was CANCELED). No, Matt Dallas has way too much of a spacey look going on. Edward is INTENSE, not a space cadet. M.Dallas played a wide eyed, (seemingly thoguhtless) alien boy w/ no belly button... not really cut from the same fabric... &, Sean Faris is fucking fine... even got a little crooked smile... but i think he's a bit too old? (He's a little TOO cute...)

Matt Dallas

Sean Faris

This is on the Edward Cullen wiki page:

"Meyer reported on her website that the four most popular fan suggestions for actors to play Edward were Hayden Christensen, Robert Pattinson, Orlando Bloom and Gerard Way."

-to this, i say No, eh-no, no, & are you fucking kidding?

-here are a few of the other suggestions that i was ok with...

Colton Haynes:

yum! I think he's definitely a cutie, but to throw this copmlex of a roll at a model/starter actor... he'd hafta be an amazing raw talent...

Henry Cavill:

He's hot. Too old (not for me, but for Bella). Loved him in Stardust, but i didn't care for The Tudors.

Here's who I think should be Edward, fo' sho (with a few alterations to make my point - eyes and hair have been "edwardized"):

Shia LaBeouf:

I know, I know, he wouldn't make a good Edward... but he's just so fuck'n yummy!

click here to see original photo, non-edwardized!

Ed Westwick:

He looks like a vampire... c'mon. Maybe he's not charming enough to be Edward, but he should absolutely take a breather from the Upper East Side to wander around the forrest of Forks... at least the Volturi in Italy.. He's a perfect vampire!

click here to see the original photo, non-edwardized!

Zac Efron:

He's just so fucking hot. Plus, he's got a lot of the necessary traits, he's got amazing bone structure, strong frame, sexy as hell, intense eyes, great smile... the only problem is that, somehow, dumb Vanessa Hudgens would end up as Bella... & i'd have to vomit. (she's ok in that sugar coated bratty, i'm realy jeal bc she's gorg & has a hot bf & is successful & way younger than me... thing.... what was i saying?)

click here to see the original photo, non-edwardized

click here to see the original photo, non-edwardized!

Chace Crawford:
i've thought that C. Crawford should have been Edward since the second i started caring about Twilight. He's perfect. He's not too old, he's not too lame, he's intense, but not scary, he's beautiful, but not girly. He'd need contacts, but then again, who the f wouldn't? If you ask me... he's the perfect Edward... he's who i'd cast... even though, the Edward in my head doesn't exsist, i think C. Crawford is the closest i could come. out of ALL these yum-monsters on this post!

click here to see the original photo, non-edwardized!

see! It's meant to be!

mmm, so many hot boys... off to read more of *eclipse*!

luvs it*

Regular Blogging

My dear reader Elise from Without Rhyme or Reason commented on my last blog & left a luvly little notice that she missed my regular blogging.

i can't tell you how much i do, too...

she asked if i had gotten a regular life (ha!)... no, i mean, i guess kind of...

work got a little crazier now that one of the girls in my dept. has left (lucky duck moved to the city... bitch!). My car broke, so i've been stressing out about that and having to find a new one, and then there's the headache i'm not sure if i was ready yet for.. i went back to school.

there's so much to tell all of you, i hate that i don't seem to have a moment to do so!

I want to write about the FASHION SHOWS that i went to in NY for Fashion week (i was IN THE TENTS AT BRYANT PARK!!!), i want to tell you about the books i've read, the shows i'm now obsessed with, everything, but i just haven't been able to. my dumb home computer is a dino and it doesn't want to allow me to do anything without me slamming it shut & saying "fuck it". That leaves me with my functional work computer, but, as i said, i rarely get the time anymore.

not to mention... AmeCakes & Jen Bunny bite my with the Twilight fever, so i've been unrealistically sucked into reading book one. (happy that i'm on a read kick, i'm about to finish my 2nd book in 3 weeks, that's pretty good for me! - but it does eat up a lot of time, i'm not a fast reader.)

anyway...

lunch break is over.

i'm still here, i check pretty regularly to see if i have any comments (teehee). so, if you read this, leave me a comment, say hi, brighten my day, let me know that i haven't lost all of you!

miss you my luvies*

xox

meet my bffer nugget... jennifer

Today, my lady-face McGee & i had this convo (abridged version)

Jennifer: u have to read my blog in a few... i'm writing a post
Spanky: lol okkkkkkkkkk / OMG! / awweeee / i'm like tearing up! / i'm such a sappy loser

hahahah / u like?

i luv u man / i commented / ur the bestest bestie there is

LOL awe loves u too

she had written this post on her wonderful blog Novelista Barista.

So, naturally, i HAVE to answer back with an adorable Bestie-luvs fest post for her. Now... i luvs all my friends, esp my super marvelous bitches, my D.A.B.s if you will... but Jennifer is totally my knees (if i were a bee)...

here is my girl crush, luvr of my life, totally in a non sexual way, hetero-life-mate, Bffer Nugget with fries LUVS LETTER to my bestie sista friend.

Jennifer*

(yes, this is the same pic she posted... but it's the best one!)

We've gotten tats together, but our friendship is way thicker than ink & def more than skin deep. This chick has lived my life... only a little different. We've shared some of the most ridiculous non-stable minded (altered, if you will) mis-understandings that we both understood. We've learned to speak in an almost secret language that usually involves typos, mumbles & drunken slurs... but we always get the message.

We've vacaed to Nantucket, spent days on the phone & have never fought (yes, she said that already). We've made a sport out of long talks in cars, laughing until our sides are literally in pain and apperently squeezing the life out of eachother in photos.

We have jokes that date back so far we can't even remember the origin, the point, or even why it's funny.. we just know that it is. (jelly...?)

We meet the most random characters & make them our random friends for life. (j-down w/ bing! my new hubby?)

We've been asked if we're sisters... told obnoxious bar doodes that we're a couple & proudly stated our BFFhood to anyone that cares. (i've even told Jennifer many a drunken night that we should have a 10 year anniversary party in a year to celebrate our union!)

We can talk about the deepest of deep epic life issues... or nothing of importance at all...

"It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long, difficult words, but rather short easy words like 'What about lunch?'" - winnie the pooh

What's next for me & my jennifer? hmm, who knows. I plan on surpassing her Blog success with my own (whoop whooop!), she's trying to drag me to NYC to live, i'm trying to get her to go to Cali, & we both desperately want to drive across the states writing a book about our Adventures.

Read her blog, keep reading mine, & look out in the future for a ridiculous book of nonsense written on the road. (fingers crossed!)

"If I had one gift that I could give you, my friend, it would be the ability to see yourself as others see you, because only then would you know how extremely special you are." -B.A. Billingsly

ya... we like it like that...

(i swear, we're not lezzies!!!)

luvs u lady*